Still Alive!

Ok, so I'm still alive; I'm just a bit overdue (try a whole month). I've not had the best couple of months overall. Life has been getting in the way a bit lately. I found myself in a bit of a creative lull after the busy festive period. I think I burned myself out and it's taken me a while to get back in to the swing of things. It probably doesn't help that January seems to go on forever and nobody has any money to spare, so business was a bit slow. I've just not had as much incentive to get things finished.

As well as a creative dry spell, I've also been in a bit of mental health slump. It's definitely not the worst it's been and I'm much better at dealing with it now. My anxiety hasn't been helped by having building work done on the house. They turned up at different times everyday so I was on edge all the time. The worst part of it all was that they needed to replace the window in my room and fill in what was originally a floor to ceiling window that had been badly boarded up. The builders were not very good at giving time estimates and Dad kept deciding on adding more work. They said they were going to start with the window then did the whole outside of the house instead. So what I originally thought was going to be a couple of days where I collapsed my bed and moved all my stuff into a heap, actually turned into a couple of weeks. I was sleeping on my mattress in the living room for a week and as my bedroom is also my work space I found it very difficult to settle in to a routine.


To add to the fun, my rickety bed frame finally snapped during all the moving about. I managed to source a much better one second hand (I had a fun ride laying on top of all the parts in the back of Dad's car because it wasn't fully dismantled and we had to collapse all the seats). It's more comfy and no more creaking! I've been struggling with really low energy levels, so it probably wasn't the best time to decide to completely re-organise my space; moving boxes and furniture, building and painting furniture. I still haven't managed to finish tidying everything away properly and the mess is driving me a little crazy. I also have plans to modify the bed for loads of storage, but that is going to have to wait until I have more energy and funds.


While all that was going on, I've also had a couple of craft fairs to prepare for. I was frantically making new stock at the dining table and trying to find safe place to put things. I've discovered that I quite enjoy interacting with people at events, although as an introvert with social anxiety I do find it very draining. This has not been helped at all by my current lack of energy. Poor Mikeydog has been very patient with me and we've had to come up with some creative ways to entertain him. He's very good at wrestling.


Oh and I've been organising 2 hen parties! Also super-fun as the phone is a big trigger for my anxiety. I seem to have managed to do an ok job so far and they're nearly sorted. Once the awkward bit of juggling the finances is out of the way I'll be able to start getting excited. Then I will get the inevitable anxiety flair up just before each one because I have to meet a bunch of new people. Yay!


I'm heading off to catch up with family and friends over the weekend. Then when I come back I have the house to myself for a week. I'm hoping I will feel a bit more motivated and refreshed so I can get things finished off.


Hopefully I'll be back to my normal schedule next week, which I'm sure you'll be happy about as it will be time for a Mikey update (and we all know dogs are better than people).


#personal #mentalhealth #break #artblock #creative #busy #anxiety #chaos #stress #life

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